When you feel unable to focus on the things right in front of you, what do you do? I have been suffering this question a lot lately. I have this overwhelming feeling of hopelessness that just doesn't go away for longer than a few days. I feel lost and confused at my own thoughts and emotions, and don't have a starting point to go by to start stepping out of this.
I feel isolated despite being around many people throughout the day. I know that most of them even care about me to an extent. Processing negative emotions has always been a challenge for me, and I think the main reason I recede into isolation and hopelessness is because I'm avoiding these negative emotions.
I need to find a way to express myself, but don't know where to start.
Things starting feeling habit and routine, and I start to crave spontaneity despite the recklessness that I know it brings.
I lose the will to eat, or I find myself eating too much.
I lose the will to read, or I find myself reading more than paying attention to my wife and daughter.
I lose the will to knit/crochet, or I find myself burying into it as an escape from what's around me.
The worst of it is, I don't realize that I'm doing it until those around me have been hurt and pushed away by my actions.
Baby steps is the way to go, but I don't know which baby steps to start with.
Peace and serenity,